The Condition

The feeling is back. The tears are unbearable but cannot be stopped. Suppression is not an option when it comes to the reality of her life. Three years have passed, but she still has yet to cope with this unwanted baggage. Her mistakes have to live with her for life. Her feelings of loneliness stem from it. She still hears those dreaded words from the doctor. "The rest of your life." To never go away. To never be erased. To always be a hazard to others. The preparation she made for herself from that day forward is still intact. She can't help but to feel she will forever be alone. The kids she wants will never exist. The marriage she wants will not happen. To love and live with another will only happen to a certain extent. Her lack of care for herself in her younger days has cost her precious gift of unlimited expression, and she emotionally still hasn't been able to live with it. She thinks those that know and have chosen to be with her in erotic ways, but she also considers the fact that all will never be the same. Her cries continue, but the only person that has sympathy for her is herself. Only one person has any idea of how she feels, but even that person doesn't know the true pain she feels inside because of this condition. A few bags of emotion have created homes in her brain, making her feel these ways. The fear of being heartbroken. The wait for her insecurity to take over her life. The hurt she would feel if she brought this on someone else. The anger she feels inside towards the person that has put her in this position. She used to love herself with all her heart, but it is just a percentage. A small part of her is in intensive care, and all she wants to do is bring it back to the most stable condition. The mirror at times is her best friend, but at times, it is her worst enemy. She lays there thinking to herself that no one would not want to live like this forever. Suicide has never been an option, but depression has already happened. Sadness is something she is all too familiar with. She still loves herself, but she can't help to harp on the mistakes she has made and the lifestyle she has to live. Slowly repairing the hole that has been burned through her heart, she says a prayer, wipes her eyes, and turns over to face the wall as she wishes her daily nightmare would become a mere thought. If only she can channel her optimism to overpower the power that has been given to her condition. Her future is bright, but the light dims and makes it uncertain when these moments of regret to surface. Self-pity and fear are not to be an option, but yet they both resurface in her brain like it is okay. She doesn't want to fight with it. She wants to deal. She will not live this way. She will not continue life in this fashion. She falls asleep with the thoughts of being person that loved herself wholeheartedly before this came about. The condition will take over itself but not her...she knows so...

After Dark Daydreams

The moon is full and fills the sky with its light, shining out of the clouds that have cleared out from the rain. The beautiful sight of the stars bring on the erotic and romantic fantasies that can be thought of but not spoken. Staring out of the windows, daydreaming starts to become the activity of the moment. The idea of love being made on the roof of the car in front of the window as rain pours down on the two bodies. The pornographic scene of fucking in the backseat as music plays from the radio making the sexy man of the scene go harder and harder. The passionate idea of being laid down on a blanket in a field of grass below the stars, exploring each other's bodies with hands, tongues, and lips. The far away fantasy of fucking in an abandoned house as the weather becomes worse. The more pleasant dream of making love on the beach. Daytime is not an occurence in the beautiful and steamy movement of the imagination as nighttime has become the star of these mental creations. As the time passes and the stars make their way to the outs for the remainder of the night, daydreaming does not waiver, bringing on thoughts of waking up to the sex that is to be made in the morning. The mere thought of the collision of these dreams with reality ignite the senses of the person that houses these extraordinary feelings. Night time is turning into morning, and the moon is disappearing, but the awaken dreams are anything but real. The term after dark starts to become a thing of the past but only until night falls once again. Until then, the momentary creations of the mental process are to be put away.

Caressed Part 1

Yes, that's the feeling that she was looking for. He holds her close as they both sleep away the exhaustion and physical toll of the day plus the intimacy and passionate work they decided to give each other. As her head lays against his chest, he dreams of the things that occurred throughout the day. The early morning drama of the job. The mid afternoon break-up with the girlfriend. The tears that flowed as the beautiful lady laying next to him told him everything will be okay, caressing his face and smiling for the both of them. She didn't mention the note left by her now ex-boyfriend telling her of the other woman and the love child they have. She didn't talk about the fact that he emptied out his things from the place that they shared and told her on a piece of paper that he never loved her. Instead, she took on the task of comforting a friend in need. He relaxed to her touch, and they both felt the comforting electricity that ignited at the moment. The kiss that came next was long overdue. The hands that rubbed each other's bodies made them both relax. He caressed her back as he proceeded in removing her clothes. She blushed and helped him undress, leaving an article of clothing leading all the way to his bed.  The night that have been longing from their former significant others they gave to each other. Kissing each body part as it's exposed. He sucked on her breasts and moved down to her pussy, licking and sucking on it with everything he had. She came over and over, but she knew it was just the beginning...

An Unknown Rescue

The brightness of the sun woke us both up out of our sleep. We both were so comfortable. The events of last night were extraordinary. Who knew this would happen? Never in our wildest dreams did we think this would happen. Clothes all over the place. Shoes never making it to the bedroom. As we look each other in the eye, we know it's time to separate. I put on my clothes, remembering how I ended up here. That son-of-a-bitch told me  about her. Hoe he loves her. How he wants her  and not me. I ran from the party. You left your date to check on me. You gave a hug for comfort. We looked at each other, caressing each other's faces. And then it happened. One second, it was just a peck on the lips. Two seconds, it was softer and longer feel. Three seconds, I felt your tongue explore my mouth, and I reciprocated. Five minutes passed. The passion was too much for us to stay. I agreed to follow you home, and we spent the rest of the night learning every inch of each other's bodies, feeling each other out, relaxing each other's minds, forgetting about our own troubles. Our lips became the best of friends and loved the sensation that came from their union. I laid in your arms and drifted into the best sleep. Now, I must leave, for this is not where  I belong, and I can never come back here again. You go to speak, but I stop you. No names, no numbers, no words. Just the memory of a night neither one of us will forget. Strangers we started, strangers we'll end it. The door closes. I start the car. I laugh. I cry. I leave. It started with a kiss...

As It Pours

The raindrops hitting the window fall at a speed that is slow. The light that illuminates the room is only from the television that is no longer being watched but remains to stay on. The ceiling has become the new focal point of her attention as she lays on her back with her hands folded over her chest. She begins to have those thoughts again. The wanting of that warm body laying next to her. The need for someone to come and hold her as the drops start to fall harder. The thunder brings a jump to her spine, but the lightening only increases her intrigue in the world of affection that she has grown to know so little of. The light from the television becomes dark as she places the remote back down on the bed and goes back to her original position. She doesn't want there to be any light on the tears that have started to come down her face. She never knows where these feelings come from, but she can't fight them or prevent them. She can't help but to think about the fact that there are people in the world that are getting the intimate things that she longs for and desires every time the water falls from the sky. Wanting nothing more than to have a pair of hands to trace the skin that engulfs her body, she silently begins to weep. The day has been long. The mental state that she is in every time it rains has never changed. No one knows of the pain that she feels at this moment, and she refuses to let it out as she doesn't feel that it is necessary. Her time will come when that warm body is there every time it pours, giving her at least the comfort that someone is there to hold her if she wants it, to kiss on her if she desires it, and to make love to her like she needs it. Her emotions start to run deep, but she tries to pull herself together as if somebody is watching. The house is quiet, and all she has to comfort her is the sounds of the storm that is gracefully making her way through the sky. Everything starts to spin around her as her eyes begin to burn from the tears that won't cease to exist. She remembers that she is going to be alone for the rest of the night, and that is a feeling and knowledge that she wishes wasn't true but cannot be helped. Her fate at the moment is to sleep away the ill feelings that have taken over her mental well-being, but this is nothing new to her during this weather. The love-hate relationship that she has with the form of precipitation that is coming from the sky cannot be fought. She has tried to figure out how to deal with what she is feeling, but her only solution has not come yet. As she feels her eyes getting heavy, she turns to face the wall and wraps herself in the beautiful covers that are placed on her loosely clothed body. She wipes away the remains of the cry she shares with no one when it pours, but it continues to rain inside and out. Her internal smile has turned into sadness as she closes her eyes and begins to drift into the land of dreams that shows her the things that she longs so deeply for and is not within her reach. Tonight, the romantic world that she enters into serves as nightmares to her, and she rather not even sleep if these are the things that are going to come to her, but she knows that this is something that she can't be avoided. The phone is on silent. The television plays no sound and shows no picture. The room is as dark as her heart feels as loneliness surrounds the room. The rain, as much as she doesn't want it to be, is her only affection for the night as it caresses her mind away from reality and into the dreaded world of her passionate fantasy...

All Nighter Part 2

The feeling that she is getting from him suckling on her breasts is enough to make her cream. He looks her in the face and asks, "What can daddy do for his bitch?" She grins. "Fuck my mouth and come down my throat." She gets up and motions for him to sit in the chair after she stripped him of the rest of his clothes. Getting his dick hard took next to nothing, but she wanted to thoroughly enjoy having temporary control, so she licked and caressed each one of his balls with her tongue, then she held onto his dick as she had him stand up. He entered back inside her mouth and grabbed her head as he slowly but surely gave her every inch of what she wanted. He creates a steady pace, moaning at the great feeling her mouth was giving him. She plays and caresses his balls as she knows he is about to cum. She sucks along with his rhythm, helping him to reach that point. It shoots and slides down her throat, allowing her to swallow every drop. He loves it so much, his dick stays hard as a rock, so she knows it's that time. She puts it on him and sits back on the desk, spreading her legs and saying, "i want it daddy." He grabs her body as she wraps her legs around him. He enters her slowly, taking his time with her so that he doesn't ruin thr moment. She moans and relaxes her body to get that feeling. His pace picks up. Her breathing speeds up. He sucks her titties one by one, not losing his rhythm and feeling her pussy tighten. "Scream baby" is what he says to her as he starts to pound her. Neither one of them hears the music anymore as he pulls out and instructs her to turn around. She bends over the desk and screams, "FUCK ME DADDY!" He obliges as he pulls her hair and rams hard into her pussy. He feels her cum all down his dick and starts to lose control. Moans are coming from the both of them as she continues to cum over and over, making him fuck her harder and harder. He rubs her back and pulls her hair harder as she throws it back. FUCK!! is all he can say as he feels himself about to reach his ultimate high. They continue to meet each other's rhythm, both breathing, harder and harder, getting louder and louder as they knew it's that time. She squirts all down the both of them, and he cums harder than he has ever had before. The calming period starts as he slows down and pulls out. She falls to the floor, and he joins her. They share a laugh as they both realize how silly they might look on the floor. They do a brief clean-up of each other, put back on their clothes, and share an embrace. The kiss between them was even sweeter, and she exited his workplace, making sure that nobody saw her. He smiles to himself as he puts his place back together. Another placed to add to the list...

All Nighter Part One

He is sitting there at his office and letting the silence engulf his mind. The clock on the microwave reads 2:15am, and he is dreading being there for 3 more hours. The vibration from his phone is too much to ignore. He looks at it and sees a text from the chick his mind has been on all day. She wants to know what he is doing. "About to go crazy at work" is what he says to her. "I know where you are. Want company?" is what she sends back. Tonight is the night he decides to live out his dreams and tells her to come in his favorite outfit. He reads that she'll be there in 10 minutes. He thinks about going to his car and getting the proper equipment for what is about to happen, but he knows she will have it all. The blue Chevy is in his sights. She stops right in front, obstructing the view of the window even more than before but enough to still see out of it from the inside. He gets excited and lets her in as she walks towards him in the black and red lace bra and panties covered by a short trench coat. She slips off the coat, and he proceeds to grab her body close to his and kisses her neck. He looks her in the eye just in time to hear her say "I wanna hear it right now." He goes to the specific playlist on his iTunes and watches her sit up on the desk as Sex for Yo Stereo plays throughout the room. He runs his hands up her legs and moves his chair away from them. She bites her lip as he takes the panties off with his teeth and places them on the desk beside her. It's that time to work his dreams out. He pulls off his shirt and gets on his knees before her, witnessing her legs spread, inviting him in. He dices in, licking and sucking on her clit, reaching every inch of her G-spot with his tongue, holding her body still as much as he can without hurting himself or her in the process. The wetness of her pussy engulfs his face, and she cant help but scream out in ecstasy. Both are loving the feast he is portaking in, but they both know it's not going to end there. Slurp! is all that can be heard from every corner of the room as Say Yes blurs from the computer. He slowly raises, kissing his way up her body to her face, planting kisses on her lips and caressing her breasts. "I'm going to fuck you good" is what he tells her as he slowly removes her bra and kisses each titty respectively. She knows all she has to do is follow instructions as she wraps her legs around him and enjoys the royal treatment she is getting...

Day Dream (originally written 4/19/11)

It all happened within a matter of five minutes, but it felt like an eternity. Just sitting there in the corner of the library, he was watching her walk up and down the aisles, placing the books back on the shelves. What he was observing was something he couldn't believe he was staring at. For the man that was sitting in that chair, he wouldn't have ever thought of even glancing at her, but now that he has the time to truly see her beauty, he cant help but to look. His mind starts to wonder to the possiblity of trying to talk to her. He sees himself being rejected over and over until she finally says yes. He then sees himself and the intellectual that has caught his eye walking in a park and telling each other their whole life stories. There is the time that passes, and he then expresses his love for her. She changes the man that is known for being stubborn, and he makes love to the girl that nobody would expect him to date let alone propose to. The fate that he forsees in his head is the life he thought he would never think about, but she has changed all that within a matter of five minutes, but she doesn't even know that he is interested. The day dream he was living in ended when she looked at him, waving to her new admirer and returning to he duties. At that moment, he made the executive decision that this corner in the library would be his just so he can live in those moments over and over again until the day he makes it reality. He knows now that some of the best dreams don't occur in his sleep.

Slumber

The laughter that is going on is something that says tired. The goofyness that is going on tells them both its time to call it a night. He pokes fun at her wrap around her hair. She tells him he looks drunk because his eyes were drooping. The gitty nature is something that means they are both ready to close their eyes. They climb under the covers. The bed is so warm to their bodies as they both have on next to nothing. He opens his arms to her body to be close to his. She happily accepts and slowly lays her head on his chest so that she can feel his heart beating. They continue to joke and play, delaying the inevitable. She starts to close her eyes as he wraps his arm around her. She can feel him relaxing under her. Just a shutting of the eyes turns into the deep, relaxing sleep they both were fighting. She dreams of the place that she already was in, but she couldn't help but to feel absolutely comfortable whe she was. Yes, the dream world that the two were in was great, and the silence between them was peaceful. All is well in the land of imagination and thinking that they both entered. Neither one couldn't have been in a better place.

The Stage

The lights are on. The camera is watching. All eyes are on the chick in the red and black lace. She's nervous, but she doesn't turn back now. Its the moment of truth. Time to give daddy the performance his bitch should give. She starts by moving her hips. Yeah she sees him sitting there looking. He won't have to move for a while, so she is making sure he is in her zone. As the music plays, she moves to the beats. He loves what he sees but he wants to touch her bad. She turns. She shakes. She grinds. She winds. Her hands move all over her body. His dick starts to rise, and she knows it. She walks over to him after removing her bra and places her titties in his mouth one by one. He is loving this teasing but wants the whole thing. She takes his clothes off him and starts to kiss on his body. She works her way to his dick and sucks it royally because she knows its hers. She gets it as hard as she wants it but tells him not to move a muscle. She places the condom on. She takes off her now wet panties. He helps her straddle him in the chair in which he has been occupying all night. The camera is still watching as she is continuing what she considers her best show for him yet. Faster and faster, she rides her dick and moans as he caresses her titties which definitely belong to him. She reminds him how much she loves being his bitch as she rides harder and harder. He can feel her tighten. She can feel his pussy about to cum hard. She screams. He moans. Damn what a great feeling. She slowly gets up and turns around. She bounces on her dick softly but makes sure he is still comfortable, still enjoying his bitch every way that she wants him to. Faster. Moans. Circles. Groans. Vibration. Screams. He runs his hands on his body and holds on to her tight, starting to hold her down so that she can feel every inch of him. She feels his breathing getting harder. She doesn't want it to end. She gets up and tells him "fuck me like its the last time daddy." He points at the chair and says "bitch bend over." She happily does so and waits for him to give her the business. He doesn't hesitate to fuck his pussy with all he got, but she starts to throw it back just as hard. He is surprised but doesn't stop her. Its her stage tonight. He is definitely just on it. The grand finale is coming. He starts to fuck her faster and faster, giving her the dick just like she asked him to. She fucks back with the same intensity. He gets louder. She gets louder. They meet each other at that high place of pleasure. Time to come down. The camera is done watching. The two make there way down to reality again and walk towards their shower. Little do he know, the second act is going down in his bed, but she grabs the plastic wrap off the couch and slowly prances behind the one she calls her nigga...the lights are turned off. Time to leave the stage for the night. Part one was definitely a success.

The One with Heels

Click. Click. Click. Click. Heels walks in the room with the most excited but sexy look in her eyes. She is looking at the One sitting in the chair watching her, waiting for her to make her move. The One has always wanted Heels, but tonight is the night that she will have her. As Heels slowly creeps her way across the floor, the wonderful sound of Raindrops plays in the background. The One has had her eyes on the mocha beauty that is in front of her for so long, and she longs for her body like she has never done before. As Jeremih sets the mood through the song, Heels removes the clothes that are covering the curves The One couldn't help but dream about. Click. Click. Click. Click. Heels works her way over to The One and straddles her gently. "Its our time tonight" is all she says in her ear. Heels grinds softly in The One's lap as they kiss and caress each other. Hands are ran across breasts. Heels' naked body is all that The One wants at the time. They share a moment of lust and need as they know its time to make it to the bed. If only they didn't have to deal with the man standing in the front door...

Confrontation

Hey you. I know that you look at me everyday and ask me the same questions, but I want you to know this is the time to let it be known. I love you with everything in my power, but you're torturing yourself. You know that the feelings you have inside are crucial. You know what you feel for one, but what about the other one? Yeah, you can tell yourself only for so long the lie you want me to believe, but I know the truth. I know that you have pushed some things to the side just to have the moments that you want to have. Is it worth it? Yeah you won't say them out loud, but we know what it is. Are you going to ever declare to the world what you have done? Or are you going to leave your heart in limbo? You know the words you heard last night hurt. They hurt because you know they are true. Maybe it is about time you start listening to me again. You know I know what's best for you. That's why you feel so damn miserable. Melancholy is not a good look on us, so you should try to smile more. If you were as happy as you want to be, then maybe smiling could hell of a lot easier. Poor you. I have no sympathy because you did this to us, and I have to fix it. We are going to get you back to the one that everyone loves. Stop being the bitch you never wanted to become. You can decline taking bullshit without having to be the cold-hearted chick he thinks you are. Wish you could have that other one huh? No you don't because he is going to be the one to break your heart, remember? Can't believe you said that stupid shit. You know you are scared of hurting him and anybody else that gets that close. I'm going to make sure you don't hurt again. I just wish it could be now. Don't cry sweetie. The tears you shed are not going to change the fact that we don;t know what to do, but I'm sure we will be fine eventually. We just have to work on making that happen. Don't cut all our hair off but definitely dye it another color. Get things done and stop stressing. Slowly get through it all and you will be exactly where you want to be at. You have stopped loving yourself like you used to. I know it. That's why I'm here to tell you that we need to rebuild the chick that we both know and love. At least you want to be alone with your misery, but soon we will cut that short. Time to make changes baby. Let's do it. Consider this your intervention. Now, leave the bathroom because you have been looking at me long enough. Just know every time you're here staring in this mirror, I'm looking right back at you. We will always see each other again. Muah kiss to you babe.

Torment

She sees him with the new chick. Her mind starts to freeze. She can't stand the sight of it. The love she has for him won't allow her to process what is going on at that very moment. She stops jumping to conclusions. It couldn't be that way. It's just her mind playing tricks on her. He kisses the girl on the lips. She starts to lose control of her senses. How could he move on so fast? We're not over yet. We are not apart. The reality that she is single for what is now months has not hit her yet. This can't be true. He loves me still is what she tells herself as the couple walks even further away. Her heart starts to make its way to the pit of her stomach. The pain that she is feeling cannot be matched with a bullet to the chest. She walks away, thinking her heart had let go of him but knows that he still has possession over the one thing she thought she wanted to herself. Love still is there, but she can't seem to grasp that hers is invested in something that is not there anymore. She feels tortured. She feels betrayed. She feels happy for him. She feels mad at him. Jealousy is beneath what she feels towards that sight of affection that she lacked. Wishing she still had him, she walks away feeling defeated. In her world, she has just walked out of the eye of the storm and is now entering what could be hell. Fate could not have brought her this low. Only her thoughts are there with her as she cries herself into the slumber she desired.

Slow Motion (originally written April 11th)

I look at the time. 3:21 it says. Wow I thought it has been way longer than that. As I stare at the walls around me, I start to wonder into a state of drift. Man this really got me blown. I look out the window to see if there is something that is going to save my sanity, but I see nothing. The people across the way don't even know that I exist at the moment, but soon they will. I move my fingers across my face to see if there is any effect that will amuse me. Sadly there is none. The sounds of the flying bugs outside and the tugs are the only things constant. This can't be all there is to it. I try to find that place in my mind to tell me to wake up because this is all just a dream, but that place isn't there because I'm wide awake. Thoughts of pain, hurt, anguish, and laughter start to come through my brain. I start to relive recent events and try to forget that some things have changed. Alone for the first time, everything is moving slowly but surely. I know the price to pay, but I'd rather keep the money if I can't have happiness. The randomness of tomorrow is starting to slowly come together and bring itself into life, as it becomes today. Has the world seen what I saw? Will anyone ever feel what I feel? Yes time is of the essence, and patience is a virtue that I am starting to no longer possess. The pleasure factor is moving as slowly as the time is. My life is gracefully moving in the right direction. Sitting in here with these walls surrounding me, I start to hope that time has moved as fast as it does slow...time now: 3:41. It's the moment that surrounds everything else and starts to consume it. As I sit here and stare out the window, I can only imagine what will happen next...

No Touching

Hello is what I say to you when I pick up the phone. It's the middle of the night, but I know you want me just as bad as I want you. The convo goes straight into what each other is feeling. We know we can't have each other, but we also know that talking about it can do some justice. Touching each other can't happen on a physical level as our lives wouldn't permit it for the night, but we still have the option of sharing our thoughts. You telling me how much you rub on my body. I start to feel your lips against my neck. We see each other naked and about to work each other out. As I lay in bed touching on what's yours, I start to feel your presence. As you tell me how you feel me kissing on what's mine, my breathing starts to get heavy. Thoughts just became real as I tell you how I want to make you cum and swallow all of it. You tell me how hard I'm making you. Th thought of you sucking on my titties is driving my pussy insane, and the words that you are saying is making this wonderful. I tell you, "let me ride it baby." "Come on" is all I heard. Legs are spread. Moans are heard. Breathing gets deeper. Harder and harder, I feel her about to give way, but I don't wanna hop off the ride. Cumming hard, I lose control, "SHIT!" is what we both  can breath out. You lay my body down. I brace myself for what is coming. You slide in slow. I wrap my legs around you. As your strokes get harder, my pussy gets wetter. This is what we both see. This is what we both want. Damn this is a great feeling. I hold my legs back as you fuck me with all you got. I scream. You muffle your mouth with my titty. I start to cum but I don't stop. You feel it surrounding your dick. The breathing gets harder. I know its about to happen. You say my name as you cum for me just like I desired. I say yours as I come down down from the high that you brought me to. We both pause. We share a laugh as we both realize that some of the best happens only in the mind and involves no touching each other. Our bodies are weak. Round 2 will have to wait until we see each other again...or until another late night is saved by a phone call. As we both look at a clock, we realize that our time is up and sleep is necessary. We prepare to clean ourselves up and say our see you laters for it is only a matter of time before we touch again.