Hello darling,
Did you miss me? I miss you. I know that sometimes we don't see eye to eye, but hey, that is how relationships go right? How are you today? I hope that you are as fine as you look. Yes lawd! Lol okay let me get to why I am doing this. Sometimes, I like to really get out everything that I want to say in a form of a letter. So here it is. I know you say that I talk too much sometimes, but I wish you knew how much I have to say all the time. Like, all I want to do sometimes is sit there with you and talk and talk and talk. I know that no one has attention span that long. I really contemplate how we have made it this far. I mean, I want to tell you something that I have probably never told you before or have told you before and forgot that I told it to you. I have a problem with commitment. I think that when it has come to past relationships, I have always gotten my way out if I wanted one. Either that or God was telling me that it just wasn't meant to be. Well, when I put it that way, I guess I don't have a problem with commitment. I was trying to connect myself to men that I shouldn't have been with. It has been a year since we have made this official. One. Full. Year. It really does not feel that way to me. To me, it still feels like this thing just started, and we are still in some kind of honeymoon phase that we can't get out of. I love it this way. Our first few months were rough because we are two people that are used to things being the exact opposite of what we were encountering. I can tell, but I wasn't going to give up on us because of it. For the first time in four years, I had fully felt that I could invest my feelings into a man. Yeah I have liked them, and yeah I have had feelings for one, but no one compares to you. When we first started spending time together, something told me that all I needed to do was keep trying. Keep telling you how much I wanted your attention. Keep telling you how much I wanted you around. Keep expressing to you how much I wanted your body, At the same time, I couldn't help but wonder if I was the only one that you were giving this time to. You have been my one and only since the night at the Extended Stay in Sandy Springs. I really didn't want anybody else, and I still don't. I can still feel the kiss you put on my forehead that night. I can still feel your hands around me and the way that you touched me. The sex. Omg the sex. There is a reason I am an addict of you. Every since that first time, I crave you like I crave a drink when I am thirsty and food when I am hungry. I need that. Using the word want in that sentence would be an understatement and a lie. You are a need for me. I need you, and no matter who thinks I shouldn't tell you that I need you, I am always going to tell you that because that is the truth. Week after week, I looked forward to spending time together. It was always fun and helped me relax my mind. You always made it fun for me. Hell, you have never stopped making it fun for me. Every time we are together is another memory that is being made. Yeah we don't always see eye to eye. Yeah I know that I am crazy as hell and I go off sometimes. I know that we are two temperamental people that have very unique and functional relationship, and I have to honestly say that I love every second of it. For the first time in my life, I am not waiting around for the bad stuff to happen. I'm not waiting for you to do something foul or for you to leave or trying to guess when we will be over. I have now become completely comfortable with us and this situation. You are the most amazing man that I have ever met, and it is funny that I say that now because we couldn't even stand each other when we met, I am so glad that has changed. I love you so much, it can't even be put into words. I hate it when you are not around. I miss you when you are gone. I want to me all up under you every chance I get. I need your love and attention. I need your affection and warmth. You make me feel whole. You make me feel safe. You make me feel good. Real good actually. You make me the happiest woman alive. There is no other man that I want on this Earth more than you. As God as my witness, I will not give you up for nothing. You would have to leave me because I am not going anywhere. I always look forward to anything having to do with you, and just so you know, I get excited every time I see your name and face pop up on my phone and hear your ringtone play in my ear. I can't wait until I have you around all the time. I miss you too much when you are gone. You get on my nerves, and I know I get on yours too, but one thing that I do know: I can't be without you. You are one sexy ass man, and I swear I get horny every time I look at you. I mean like so horny I just want to strip you naked and make you fuck me right where we at. Yes yes yes yes yes yes! It is always that serious. I have these thoughts running through my head all the time of us and what our future could hold. God himself and us are the only ones that can really determine that. As long as you are willing to keep me baby, I am yours. As long as you are willing to allow it, you are mine. I can't think of a better person to be my other half than you. From asshole to another, you are my everything. I love you Big Poppa.
Your girlfriend and lover,
Keshia N. Holt (insert hugs and kisses)
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